Something I’ve been noticing this eclipse season is what happens after we make a new choice — especially when that choice involves a boundary.
People get used to us being a certain way. Our families, our friendships, our work relationships — they all develop a rhythm around who we’ve been and the roles we’ve played. So what happens when we change?
Maybe there’s a dynamic you’ve been tolerating that once felt fine but no longer does. Maybe you’ve spent years being the “cool girl” — unbothered on the surface, quietly uncomfortable underneath. Maybe you’ve been the peacekeeper in your family, and you’re no longer willing to keep the peace at your own expense. Maybe a big life change has simply asked you to relate to people differently than you used to.
You set the boundary. You trust yourself. And then — someone has a reaction. Sometimes a big one.
This is one manifestation of the Illusion of Drama: when we take an aligned step and the response feels like real opposition, we start to interpret the disruption as evidence. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. Maybe this is the wrong path.
But another person’s reaction doesn’t tell us whether our choice was aligned. Sometimes it just tells us that something has changed — that a relationship organized around your accommodation has to reorganize now that you’ve stopped accommodating.
Our work is to stand by our principles and hold space for things to be messy, without needing them to go according to plan. To let someone else have their response without making it our job to manage it. Because the moment we start needing everyone to react a certain way — that’s a whole other territory. The Illusion of Control. We’ll go much deeper into that one another time. 😉
For now, I’m curious — where are you being asked to trust a new choice, even when the response around you doesn’t look the way you hoped?
Meet me on the Temple Steps 🌙
Thursday, August 27th at 6 PM CST / 4 PM PST / 7 PM ET — on your favorite social platform: Facebook, YouTube, or Instagram.
The Temple Steps is a free public virtual gathering, and this one falls on the day of the Pisces Lunar Eclipse — a potent one for us to go deeper into these themes together with a collective reading, healing, and card pulls. I’ll send links closer to the day.
Thank you, and please take good care of yourself this eclipse season.
With Love and Wisdom,
Lauren — Founder of Love Renegades, Black Belt Mystic, Psychic Healer for Humans + Animals
