Maneuvering an Emotional Chokehold

As a Love and Relationship Psychic and Coach, I have the pleasure of connecting with people about their love lives and relationships.  Recently, I felt inspired by a client’s session and received Divine Guidance (and her permission) to share this with you. 

She is a beautiful, vibrant woman. Highly intelligent, successful, and quite kind.  She is the type of person many of us would see and think, “Her life is perfect. She has it all figured out.”

The reality is that she has been in an emotionally abusive romantic relationship for three years too long. 

She has told herself that she can fix it—that if she could just “be better” and “work harder,” then her partner would be happy—and that maybe the relationship would one day be what she has always wanted it to be.

In this relationship, she often experiences feeling devalued, dismissed, wrong, and anxious. She is not treated with love and respect. Many times, she has wanted to leave but has chosen to stay. She is losing confidence.

Does anything about her story feel familiar to you?   As someone who loves to identify and dismantle illusions that separate us from Love, which I call the Illusions of Relationship™—I am excited to shed light on this common situation with a Love Renegade’s perspective, starting with mistaken thinking.

My client’s mistaken thinking was such that she believed that “being better” was going to going to lead to new enjoyable experiences in her relationship. Her motivation for “being better” was with the expectation that her [former] partner would like her more or treat her better. Although completely understandable, this approach is not only manipulative but also a form of self-deception.

The mistaken thinking at play here aligns fully with the Illusions of Relationship™, but not with Love. If continued, actions made from such thinking would result in more opportunities to deceive and be deceived, more reasons to stay stuck, and more dissatisfaction in relationships—causing a lot of pain and frustration!

Now back to my client—-in addition to being gorgeous and successful—she is a martial artist. In her coaching session, her Guides and I directed her to apply martial arts to this common relationship dynamic.  From this exercise, she uncovered that her [former] partner’s “signature move” against her was a chokehold-—which made perfect sense for her!

See, the throat is the energy center of communication, authenticity, and self-expression.  When we have blocks on our throat chakra, we are experiencing difficulty in speaking or living our truth.  Nothing about this relationship really supported her in shining as her authentic self!

As we continued the session, I watched her throat chakra heal as she connected with her inner Love Renegade. As she saw the enlightened truth before her, she embraced a new perspective that will support her in breaking free of an emotional chokehold and the Illusions of Relationship™.   

Of course, without being consciously aware of it, many of us unknowingly allow ourselves to be put into emotional chokeholds. For your own healing and illumination, I encourage you to spend some time with the following questions: 
 

  • What would I do or say if I felt more trusting and confident? 
  • Is there anywhere in my relationship or life where I am deceiving myself?
  • What part of me wants to shine? 

The Backlash of Success

Whatever you have been through has made you who you are today.

For those of us who have “gotten our asses kicked” by the Universe and who dared to make it to other side—that situation, the one that broke our hearts and overwhelmed us and the one that left us feeling completely defeated more than once—-yes that situation has made you who you are today.

Take a moment right now to acknowledge how far you have come.  What did you learn about yourself?  What wisdom did you gain from that experience? How did that experience shape you to be who are today and to have what you have?

This conversation brings us to connect with another Law of Relationship™, one of the six universal patterns of illusion that separates us from love—love in our intimate relationships, love within our life circumstances, and most importantly: the love within your own heart that allows you to tap into your personal power highest potential (aka your inner Love Renegade.)

We call this particular Law of Relationship™ the Law of Satisfaction.

(Watch this video about the law of satisfaction here====> https://youtu.be/N4jvAtfPBbY)

The role that the Law of Satisfaction plays is what causes you to settle.  It does this to protect you from having to endure similar pain and agony again.

While the Law of Satisfaction may “work” to keep your life “peaceful” and maybe even impressive from the outside looking in—it can hinder you from moving into your next level of LOVE and growth.

It separates you from love by causing stagnation. We are stagnant we are stuck. We are not moving forward. This immediately puts us into conflict with Love, the most creative and growth-oriented energy there is.

To help illustrate the Law of Satisfaction and what you can do to break the Law of Satisfaction, I interviewed my client, friend, and colleague, Jennifer Murphy. Jennifer has an expansive and impressive life. She wears many hats and has “been through the ringer” in her relationships and life circumstances. Jennifer is a personal development expert and the creator of the No Limits Life Empowerment Institute.  

In the summer of 2018 Jennifer hired me to assist her in breaking the laws of relationship™ and in moving into her next level of potential and Love.

Watch us talk about her experience and the ins and outs of the Law of Satisfaction and enlighten yourself to what is next for you====> https://youtu.be/N4jvAtfPBbY