There is a difference between doing something new with gusto and trying. When we try, we are unknowingly activating the Illusion of Perfection, one of the Illusions of Relationship™. It’s a heavy energy!
When we try, we act with expectation. We are expecting something to happen. Expecting someone else to do something. This creates a lot of heavy pressure, creating unnecessary obstacles and burdens. It’s draining! It is a lot to carry.
You may think “I am doing everything right! I am trying so hard! Why is this not working?”
Acting from a place of trying energizes the Illusion of Perfection and is a wonderful recipe for frustration, anger, and fatigue. These energies are not attractive when creating a new relationship—one that reflects you! Nor do they magnetize new, enjoyable circumstances in your current relationship!
See, creating a new relationship or a different result in our current relationships—both where we are free to be our true selves—takes love and conscious aligned effort. It is consistently making new choices. It’s committing to show up as the person who has their ideal relationship.
What is your ideal relationship? If you are already in a great relationship, what would make it even better?
When you answer this question, I urge you to keep your answer focused on YOU and not on your partner. Here’s why…
If you watch the the Illusion of Perfection video (which you can do here: https://youtu.be/kf6ZJvdqeG8) you will see that one of the traits of this Illusion is being judgmental and critical. When we want others to be different from who they are, we first must acknowledge the parts of ourselves that are ready for an upgrade.
Does that make sense?
Sending you blessings of divine understanding, trust, and of course: Love.
I woke up at 4:30 AM with the powerful thing about breakups resonating throughout my being. Instead of going back to sleep I found myself out of bed and on my mediation cushion ready to start the day.
Whether it is a relationship ending or a time in your life changing, many of us have a hard time letting go and moving on. We can internalize the pain. We play out the scenarios and what-if situations over and over again.
How would you feel if you were Person A in this scenario?
Person A: My heart is broken! This relationship is ending!
Person B: Congratulations!! It looks like new changes are unfolding in your life!
Would you find Person B to be really insensitive?
Years ago I hosted an event called “Soul-level Healing for Your Broken Heart.” What I came to see is that the people who attended had different expectations of healing. Instead of wanting to see a higher purpose and meaning and tap into their power, the group had a genuine desire to bask in their heartbreak and be seen for the tragedy they had just endured.
My 2016 self was a little bewildered. But I get it. I really do. Loss of any kind comes with a grieving process that has its own timeline. We all want to be listened to and heard. This is a beautiful and necessary part of healing. We need to acknowledge how we feel, but the issue comes with what happens (or what doesn’t happen) next.
Some of us go into blame and stay there. A few of us will even see the other person as a villain. Again, there is nothing inherently wrong with this. It’s a part of the healing process.
Then, there is another scenario. This is the one where we do not want to let go, because we are too afraid of what life would look like without a relationship with that person. Even if we did not like the relationship and verbalized that we wanted something different, we are not quite ready go into the unknown. Instead, we hold on.
Each of these responses to change separates you from your power. A huge part of healing is reclaiming your power.
Here is where the wisdom of your inner Love Renegade comes in…
…What if the circumstance or breakup was ultimately in your highest good?
…What if the presence of the other person, villain or not, gave you the opportunity to set a boundary or uphold a new standard for yourself?
…What if the Universe is guiding you toward having the relationship and circumstances that your heart yearns for?
There is a reason why I chose relationships as my area of specialization. For years I was a magnet for people who wanted me to be someone I was not and who would get really angry and project their own wounding onto me. For so long I felt that something was wrong with me. I held onto these relationships. I worked on myself and turned myself inside out. Then, one day I saw the Truth and set myself free.
In my empowered path of healing, I have chosen to align with my divinity, my soul-level gifts of Divine Wisdom and Divine Love. I have chosen to live my design and free myself from illusion. From this, I have healed my body, enjoy a passionate and healthy relationship with my husband, and nurture loving and supportive relationships.
I also share my love by coaching amazing people in living their Divinity and freeing themselves from the Illusions of Relationship™. It’s been a huge journey. I treasure the sacred work I get to do with my clients, whether it is for one conversation or years of sessions. I am deeply grateful.
Over the years I have found that every relationship shows us how important it is to love yourself and know your power. When you accept this as truth, you magnetize every person and experience to you that empowers you to be your highest potential.
Every relationship, regardless of how long it lasts or how it ends, comes with a gift. Will you receive this gift?
Thank you for reading. Sending you blessings of healing, empowerment, and love.
Love Renegade Wisdom & Healing Blessings,
P.S. In addition to the Forgiveness video above, here is another healing resource, called “Your Solution for Feeling Hurt & Let Down,” to help you feel better as you heal from a breakup or embrace the potentially amazing changes that are unfolding in your life: https://youtu.be/ogPFf3UbV6A
The Law of Drama is the Law of Relationship™ that separates us from love with dramatic experiences, over-reactions, resentments, and mistaking our [very loud] feelings for our intuition.
To break the Law of Drama we must accept that when we take steps toward transforming our circumstances—either in attracting our ideal partner, healing our broken hearts, enhancing our current relationship, or in up-leveling other parts of our lives—we are making a conscious choice to instigate change our lives.
When we choose to change, Drama knocks on our door ready to support us with the transformation we desire.
Most of us, when we experience drama, get lost in negative loops of thought and emotion. This may cause us to abandon our plans for transformation and to sabotage our progress. We may tell ourselves that we are not on the right path. We may doubt everything that we used to feel so strongly about before. Those of us who choose to break the law of drama, transcend the drama by rising above it.
See how this plays out in this “Law of Drama Case Study” with Lauren Wenzell. Lauren is a courageous, sensitive soul who writes beautiful poetry (you can check out her work on Instagram at @laurenspeacefulpoetry) and who works with children with autism. This time last year Lauren came face-to-face with the Law of Drama when her father died and just a mere few days later her longterm boyfriend broke up with her!
Watch to find out how she found her power in one of the hardest (and certainly most dramatic) times of her life here=====> https://youtu.be/bGfGcN1SSIE