the drama of going your own way
Your stomach churns. Your heart races. You have just spoken your truth only to find that someone else is let down. Perhaps they expected more of you than you were willing to give? Maybe you were (knowingly or unknowingly) dishonest. Or maybe, things changed.
Either way, it feels uncomfortable. A choice has been made and there is no going back to how things were. From that choice, and from the outcome of that choice, you are no longer the same person.
Yes, although it feels uncomfortable, there is also an impending joyful alignment!! Transformation, healing, and change can be messy.
We all have the potential to be divine masterpieces in our divine messes.
Often we are afraid to do things differently for fear that they will not work out. The fear of failure can stop us dead in our tracks. But what happens when we do take risks?
Sure, you might “fail,” but one thing is certain—clarity will prevail.
In March of this year, I declared I was permanently relocating to Maui. I took some serous spontaneous action, living in Hawaii for six months—four of those months without my husband, Daniel, and our sweet pets.
Well, near the end of my time there, things changed. While I loved Maui deeply and received so many blessings there, I had a deep knowing inside of me that it was time to go. Even though it was a tearful goodbye, the choice to leave made sense to me. And even though I intellectually knew that, I still needed to allowed myself ample time to understand and detangle my emotions around the entire experience.
It’s been a little over two months since returning to Texas. In this time I have enjoyed being in the same physical space as Daniel and in my comfy home as I go deep into contemplation. Here is just a little bit of what I found:
I liken much of my experience to a relationship. You know—the kind where you love the person deeply but the sacrifice required is often too great a price to pay?
I see my time in Hawaii as a beautiful love affair, where I had initially intended to stay, only to see that doing so was no longer aligned.
Leaving was my way of breaking free of the Illusion of Sacrifice, one of the six Illusions of Relationship™ that keeps us from connecting with Love and living our life on our soul’s terms.
Releasing our attachment to something working out a certain way (or our attachment to a certain someone) is an act of courage. At Love Renegades we say courage is the vehicle of love. It takes guts to chart your own course, to leave a situation, to say no, and to say yes.
So yes, even loving and courageous choices can come with drama! What do you think? Can you relate?
Here are three prompts for you to contemplate:
- To what or to whom are you attached?
- What risks do you feel afraid to take?
- What are your reasons for resisting change?
Even if feels uncomfortable and even if you feel emotional and maybe even nauseated—what if you trusted that everything was working out for you? What if you genuinely allowed yourself the gift of empowered healing expansion as you navigated your own course, outside your comfort zone?
